


Before Sunrise

by iceyly



Category: Kingdom Hearts (Video Games)
Genre: Gen, KH 3 missing scene, in case we are still warning, kh 3 spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-11
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:06:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27514294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iceyly/pseuds/iceyly
Summary: His eyes settle on the back of Riku, a tight knot in his gut clenching with… he doesn’t know how to describe the feeling. It’s the same knot that had twisted when Xion had approached the older boy earlier, when he had seen the play of emotion over Riku’s face as his memories had rushed back into place.Roxas thinks he recognized grief and shame and even though Xion had smiled and quietly told Riku that she didn’t blame him for anything, Roxas had viciously thought: ‘Good.’-----Regaining his body and his life hasn't automatically erased any of the grievances that Roxas had before he resigned to his fate and returned to Sora.Talking about them won't do that either… but maybe it will help anyway.
Relationships: Axel & Roxas & Xion (Kingdom Hearts), Riku & Roxas (Kingdom Hearts)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 23





	Before Sunrise

**Author's Note:**

> This One-Shot was written almost a year ago for [Summer's End: A Roxas Zine](https://twitter.com/RoxasZine)! The zine was sent out in Spring, and I've been allowed to post this since about May and kinda forgot for some reason… and well, with MoM releasing in Japan today, I figured why not post this now!
> 
> (I'll probably post something for the International Release, too… at least if I can finish the current chapter I'm writing by Friday! :333)
> 
> That said, please enjoy!

“…365,” Roxas notes quietly as he watches Sora lift his Keyblade into the sky.

“What was that?” Xion asks, her head tilting while Axel laughs quietly – much more tentatively than Roxas ever remembers hearing.

“Counting the days again, are you Roxas?” he says, his hand hovering for just a moment before he settles it on Roxas’ shoulder.

“I guess,” Roxas shrugs, a sheepish smile playing at his lips. “Old habits die hard, right?”

“Though it’s strange to think…” he continues, “There is no Organization anymore. What are we going to do with our days?”

What is there _after_ he doesn’t say – while they had been part of the Organization, Roxas had never considered anything but the present and even his short taste of a ‘normal life’ inside the simulated Twilight Town… he had never thought about the future that might wait beyond the last few days of his summer vacation.

Then, when he had realized the truth and stood before Sora in that basement… there had been no future at all.

It’s almost scary, really, the freedom they have now… they have their own lives now, Xion and him. They are their own people, separate from Sora.

“We’re gonna figure something out,” Axel tells him, squeezing his shoulder before pulling his hand away again. He sounds unconcerned, but there is an attentive note to it that Roxas wouldn’t have noticed _before_ , one that Roxas knows means that Axel isn’t dismissing his concern.

Sora disappears into the light before them, and Roxas squints for a moment before turning to Xion, returning her almost shy smile – there are so many things that he wants to say and ask, but honestly… right now, this moment? Having her and Axel at his side again?

That’s utterly priceless.

He lets his eyes drift over to the other trio they had worked with – Terra, Aqua and Ventus… was it? – and the uncanny likeness that Axel had… well, not really explained, but at least warned him about earlier; and then to Donald, Goofy and their King… and…

His eyes settle on the back of Riku, a tight knot in his gut clenching with… he doesn’t know how to describe the feeling. It’s the same knot that had twisted when Xion had approached the older boy earlier, when he had seen the play of emotion over Riku’s face as his memories had rushed back into place.

Roxas thinks he recognized grief and shame and even though Xion had smiled and quietly told Riku that she didn’t blame him for anything, Roxas had viciously thought: ‘ _Good._ ’

For all that he is at peace with Sora and his return to his Somebody, for all that he knows that there is a reason why Sora needed to be the one that continued on…

Roxas supposes, he is still a little resentful after all.

The King turns to them and smiles brightly as he announces that he’ll take care of getting them all home from here – something or other about gummi ships that have to be organized for transport, and while Roxas isn’t sure why they can’t just use the Dark Corridors, he isn’t going to question it right now.

Riku leaves their group on some excuse of having to go back and pick something up – Roxas finds himself relax just a little as the silver-haired boy disappears into the dusty canyon – and Axel has no trouble walking over to the other trio, smirking faintly as he starts up a conversation with Aqua and Ventus (“Well, how about you two introduce your other third properly?”).

Xion stays by his side though, following his line of sight into where Riku had disappeared to, reaching over to let her hand slip into his for just a moment to squeeze it.

“You should go after him,” she says, a sad smile playing at her lips. “I know what happened between you wasn’t fair to you at all, but… I think you should talk to Riku. You might be surprised.”

Roxas is surprised – though not by anything that Riku has done. “But you were gone by the time that happened! When he stopped me in the World That Never Was–”

“I asked him to,” Xion says, her lips pressing together for a moment. “I knew that we would both have to go back… and that you wouldn’t understand, not back then. That there would be no chance of stopping Xemnas, if you were killed.”

And that… that sudden admission feels as keen a betrayal as every time that Xion had turned her blade on him. Xion couldn’t have known what Riku and DiZ would do to him… how far they would go, that they would unmake _everything_ he was in order to keep him contained, but still…

This isn’t something that Roxas really wanted to know. That he ever wanted to deal with.

What he really wants is far away, and yet almost within reach, a possibility that is blinding and a little mind-boggling because there was never an _after_ until now.

Xion must be seeing that indecision on his face, because she lets go of his hand a second later and moves quickly to give him a light push towards the canyon.

“We’ll still be here when you come back,” she promises… and well. She isn’t going to let up until he gives in and goes to talk to Riku, is she?

Roxas turns his head to frown at her for just a moment, but then runs his hand through his hair and walks away. Little as that is going to resolve, he might as well get this talk over on his terms rather than on Riku’s or anyone else’s.

The canyon maze where they had fought the Organization looks just the same as it had hours ago, when Axel had led them out to meet up with everyone else, and yet… the tall stone walls have Roxas a little on edge even though the maze isn’t nearly as dark as the streets of The World That Never Was. He still thinks he prefers that everlasting night to the Keyblade Graveyard’s dusty haze covering away the sun.

When he finally finds Riku, the older boy is crouching beside a still figure covered in the very familiar cloak of the Organization, and Roxas doesn’t even register summon his Keyblade until Oathkeeper slaps warm and familiar into his palm. He can see Riku tense at the sound, the chime of the Keyblade’s summon that announced his presence, the muscles in his arm clenching tightly when he sees that twitch of the older boy’s fingers.

Then, Riku turns and his shoulders relax when he recognizes Roxas.

“Uh, hey,” he greets, sounding like he’s forcing himself to be casual. “It’s all right – this isn’t one of them.”

As if to prove his words, Riku pushes to his feet and steps aside, revealing the blank white face peeking out from beyond the coat’s hood.

“…A Replica?” Roxas murmurs – he has never seen an empty Replica body, not Xion’s and certainly not his own, but if he had to guess what a Replica without a Heart looks like, he supposes this would be it.

“That’s right,” Riku confirms before he turns his head to glance down at the empty shell at his feet. “The Other Me left this body for Naminé. I promised him to make sure she’d get it.”

_The Other Who_ , Roxas wants to ask because it’s not like Riku ever had a Nobody or anything else that he might call his Other, right? Not like he and Sora… or maybe he did after all? There are a lot of things that he doesn’t know about the older boy, Roxas can admit that. A lot of things that he doesn’t want to know, really.

So, he doesn’t ask.

“Xion told me to talk to you,” he says instead without bothering to disguise his frown. He still doesn’t think that this really will amount to anything at all.

Riku hums and nods before taking his eyes off the Replica again to meet Roxas’ stare.

“Listen…” he starts, seeming just a little more awkward that Roxas would have ever expected. Granted, most of what he knows about Riku – the things that he knows that aren’t part of his own, very unpleasant experiences with the other boy – is pieced together from Sora’s memories and in those Riku always seemed larger than life. The utter dissonance between these memories, his own and the image before him… it’s a little confusing.

Not that Roxas is about to comment on it.

“About what happened in the World That Never Was…” Riku continues, unaware of his thoughts. “I want to apologize. What we… I did, wasn’t fair to you. We should have been able to find another way.”

Another way, Riku says, but… Roxas replays that fight in the rain-slick streets of The World That Never Was, thinks about his anger and the laser focus on tearing down _all of it._

The Organization. Xemnas. Kingdom Hearts.

All to get back Xion, and that precious little amount of normalcy that they had been able to call their own in those three-hundred and fifty-eight days of his existence at that point.

“Did she really ask you to stop me?” Roxas asks, hands clenching as he fixates Riku with a glare. He wants to know the truth now.

He deserves to know the truth.

”…She? You mean Xion?” Riku asks after a moment’s hesitation. “I guess, she did… the memory of her was fading fast during our fight, but at one point I could hear her voice asking– But I would have fought you even if she hadn’t asked… so, don’t blame this on her.”

“Wasn’t planning to,” Roxas snorts, even though he still feels that keen sting of betrayal burn in his chest. He doesn’t want to blame Xion for anything – they all had been pawns of Xemnas’… Xehanort’s plan at that point. As Luxord would say… they had all just played the hand they were dealt.

“I remember…” he says, thoughts drifting to that peak of awareness he had from behind Sora’s Heart and eyes back when his Other had stormed The World That Never Was, those moments when Axel had sacrificed himself and he had fought Sora in his grief, then had watched Sora fight the remains of the Organization… “You said, maybe we didn’t have to fight after all.”

Or something along those lines anyway.

“Do you still think that now?” he asks, because now they know everything again, remember all the facts.

“I think…” Riku starts, “Under different circumstances, there wouldn’t have been any need to. If I had managed to intercept you before Xion’s death maybe… maybe then, you might have let me explain. Give you options.”

Terrible options, neither of them says, because Roxas knows that any option, any _choice_ that Riku might have offered at the time would have been an illusion at best. Going by the look on Riku’s face, the older boy knows that too.

“And if circumstances were the same?” Roxas narrows his eyes, silently daring the other boy to lie.

“…I would still do it, the same way I did back then.” Riku admits after a moment. “Assuming that I would know everything I did back then, assuming that nothing changed about the situation… I don’t think I could have acted any differently.”

Roxas blinks because, well… he hadn’t quite expected Riku to admit that. Hadn’t expected to hear the _truth_ out of him. The knot of complicated emotion in his gut unfurls a little; even if the truth is difficult and uncomfortable, he’d rather have Riku be honest with him any day. The Organization had lied to him enough to last a life time.

“That doesn’t make it right though,” Riku continues, unaware of Roxas thoughts. “Even if we needed you, needed those memories of Sora that were trapped inside you… there’s a difference between doing the right thing and doing what needs to be done. Taking you… taking your memory away… there was nothing right about that… and I’m sorry that it happened and what part I played in it.”

Roxas continues to stare at him, frowning silently. This… this admission, it wouldn’t have been enough, back then. But now… now that he understands the importance of Sora himself, now that he has Xion and Axel back and a whole future to discover for them all…

He exhales slowly before he relaxes the tight grip that he has around Oathkeeper, letting the Keyblade slip away again.

“…I don’t forgive you,” he says slowly. “I don’t know if I ever will.”

Riku nods at that, his eyes cast down a little, but he doesn’t say anything. Roxas isn’t yet finished anyway.

“But, I’m not angry with you anymore,” he continues. “I understand why it was Sora, now. I appreciate you being honest now too… about back then. And… I guess, it worked out in the end, now.”

They are all alive, all have a chance to grasp happiness. All, but Naminé, and even her… He looks down at the empty Replica.

“…Are you taking that body to Radiant Garden now?” he asks, looking at startled sea-green eyes as Riku meets his gaze again. The other nods, slowly.

“I am,” he confirms. “I figure… if anyone will now how to help Naminé with this it’s Ienzo, right?”

Roxas flexes his fingers, then nods, agreeing. Zexion and Vexen and… _that_ man… he knows, they are the ones that enabled his return. They’ll be able to help Naminé too.

“Return as soon as you are able to,” Zexion had told him, just before sending him off from Radiant Garden… Roxas isn’t sure why. Zexion – the whole person, he is now – seems a little different from back when he had known him.

He doesn’t plan to go back quite yet, anyway.

“…Can you thank them for me?” he asks after a moment, the words tripping over his tongue before he can think too much about it.

Riku nods again, after a moment. “Sure. I can do that.”

Silence falls between them again, but… it’s not bad, Roxas thinks. Not being angry or bitter with Riku, not as much at least. Even if he can’t find it in him to forgive Riku… this is good, for now.

“…Xion was right,” he says then, smiling to himself as he recalls their earlier conversation. Riku had surprised him… and he did need this conversation, more than he would like to admit even now.

Riku seems puzzled by his sudden change of mood, by the whiplash of this whole conversation, and Roxas doesn’t quite feel inclined to explain himself… but he can offer the other something of a lifeline to keep him from floundering too hard, and nothing about the idea of that feels forced or wrong.

“Let’s go back together,” he says with a grin, light and truly free… maybe even for the very first time in his life, and feels it tug his lips further up when Riku nods, his eyes soft before he leans down and picks up the empty Replica.

They have almost reached the rest of the group, when Riku asks him: “What will you do now?”

Roxas looks ahead to where Axel is waiting and Xion is waving at them both, thinks about a world with a very different sunset, about red clouds and the sand-brown bricks of the houses and the streets, and smiles with certainty:

“We are going home.”

_\-- FIN --_

**Author's Note:**

> Please consider leaving me a Kudo and/or a Comment!
> 
> Also, feel free to check out my [writing tumblr](https://iceylyst.tumblr.com/) where I post snippets whenever I write to keep track of my progress! My ask box is always open for questions or shouting!! ;)


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